


Start Running (and Say Goodbye for a Little While)

by staygaytabulous



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 11:35:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9606011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/staygaytabulous/pseuds/staygaytabulous
Summary: I'll find a way to kill him, eventually. For now, though? Looks like I'll just have to keep running. Keep running from Them, from Him... from the me who's not me, but is me.





	

My brain is mush of bad thoughts trying to creep on those that are sane. I know now what I have done, and I'm terrified I'll do something wrong again. I've been running for what seems like days, running from my shadow, that is. I can run from people, sure, but how does one run from this?

I'm out of breath, my heart pumping a mile a minute, and my feet ache in my old, ratty shoes. I can't stop, though. No, I mustn't stop, or They might catch me again. We all know what happened last time They caught me - or, well, okay - _I_  know what happened last time. I know every single detail. Every single sound He made, what He smelled like, the color of His eyes... everything.

They want me, They want to bring me to Him, so here I am, running for my life as well as away from it. He's to blame for all this. It's all His fault.

I just wanted to sleep, that's all I wanted. Why won't They let me sleep?

He's insane, He makes me insane. In reality, I am not insane, at least not as insane as He makes me out to be. I swear, I don't try to do what I did. It just happens. I lose all control of my mind, sometimes willingly, other times not so much, but either way He gets a one way ticket to my brain, my thoughts. He decides what I'll do until I manage to kick Him out again.

I am disgusted by Him and His filthy ways. I hate the way He ignores other's pain, like no one else in this damn world can feel a thing. He likes my pain, though. He feeds off it, it makes Him stronger.

This is why I'm running, to get stronger myself, to get away from Them, and more importantly, Him.

I always wondered why I thought the way I thought.  Now I know: I'm "special". That's what my parents said, my doctor, too. Well, "special" is just another way to say my head's all screwed up. If only they knew it wasn't me. If only they knew so that they could have destroyed Them. Destroyed Him. I would be sane, if they had realized, if they had taken action and listened rather than just think they knew me better than I knew myself.

Few will understand how I feel. I feel bad for those who do.

So here I am, running from me, myself, and I. Only, I'm not running from me, I'm running from Them. And, technically, I'm not even running from Them. Them, I could live with. Deal, even. I'd be fine. Really, I'm only running from Him. He's a monster with my face on as a mask. He's everything no one person wants to be. He only thinks the thoughts people think when they want to either die or kill. He's me, but I'm not Him.

I'll find a way to kill him, eventually. For now, though? Looks like I'll just have to keep running. Keep running from Them, from Him... from the me who's not me, but is me.


End file.
